ATTENTION POETS! Finding it hard to market your work? Are the rejection letters from The New Yorker and Poetry Northwest forming a discouraging pile on your desk? Do vanity publishers charge too much? Fortunately there's a solution to getting your verse into the public eye—in fact, there's a guaranteed means of ensuring its placement right between the ads for ITT Tech and Metro Employee of the Month posters. Every day, tens of thousands of tired commuters pile into their seats and turn their weary eyes upward for the inspiration you can provide! That's right, we're talking about the Metro Transit Poetry Bus Project, established in 1992, and now a proven way of finding grateful readers for your iambs, your trochees, your quatrains and couplets. And it's oh-so-simple! Each year Metro sponsors an official poetry competition, with its Spring 2000 competition soon to begin! Winners will be proud to see at least one of their finely wrought works on every bus in the fleet! (Sixty special buses are devoted solely to poetry.) Below, some samples of my own entries in the imminent competition, which—all modesty aside—are sure to triumph in that contest. (Don't be discouraged if you can't match their individual brilliance—there's always next year, and another bus to catch.) Sonnet No. 43 Shall I compare thee to a Metro bus?
Thou art more lovely and more oft on time
At movies, plays, and many various
Occasions when, 'tis true, the sun did climb
Well past the designated date when I,
In shame, did make you wait near endlessly
Because my Volvo's clutch had gone awry,
And forced reliance on the Forty-Three,
Which by circuitous route left me lost,
Alone, adrift, forlorn, and somewhere south
Of Yelm, but short of what a new fare cost!
Where cruel driver said with smirking mouth,
May ye this lesson learn (too late, alas!),
That timely love requires a monthly pass. Unfinished fragment I wandered lonely as a bus
That stops on routes diversified,
When all at once I saw a fuss,
A host, amassed by Park & Ride.
One asked a lift downtown to work.
Replied I: Get your own car, jerk! Selected haikus isn't this my stop,
so familiar and yet
so unwelcoming? can i sit down please,
or would you rather keep all
those seats to yourself? please don't sit down here,