Man-o-Maneschewitz are we glad we didn't go to Roskilde! Can you imagine, traveling 5,000 miles and Oasis go and cancel!

One good thing about being


The Culture Bunker

Man-o-Maneschewitz are we glad we didn't go to Roskilde! Can you imagine, traveling 5,000 miles and Oasis go and cancel!

One good thing about being back in America: Caught a great episode of 90210 on FX—Steve kisses a trannie, Brandon gets busted with Valerie's doobie, and Kelly considers lesbianism. Classic. . . .

We've hit the Year 2000 halfway point and Michael would like to declare Chris Starling's Planet Painkiller the Best Record of the Year Thus Far, followed by Doves' Lost Souls, and Science and Nature from the Bluetones of all people. Jason is far too important to listen to pop music, though he quite likes "The Thong Song."

Important Cultural Moment of the Week: Beck turns 30. We hear he's a Scientologist. What's up with that? In other What's Up With That? news, why are the girls in mint commercials—Certs, Smints, all of 'em—so damned hot? One more: Have you people seen John and Greg Rice, the little tiny "real estate personalities" and official smallest 3-foot-tall identical twins in the Guinness Book of World Records? WUWT?

The other day Michael stopped by Cellophane Square to pick up a copy of the David Johansen & The Harry Smiths album (which is most excellent, PS) and with their computer's assistance, was able to find a used copy filed under J in the blues section. Here's the scary part: The staff had no idea who he was talking about. The problem with you kids today is you've got no damn sense of history.

Munchausen by proxy. That's some fucked up shit right there. . . . You know what was a good tune? Reflex's "The Politics of Dancing." Somebody ought to cover it, though we suppose Smash Mouth will get to it eventually. . . . One of these days we're going to crack and actually buy one of those Spring Break/Mardi Gras/Girls Gone Wild videos. The pain, the pain. . . .

Observations from Jason's recent road trip with Larry King: Is there a better soundtrack for the hills of Wyoming than Pavement's Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain? Plus, when you cross into South Dakota, Box Elder is but an hour away. . . . It's very fucked up that the directions for something in Yellowstone National Park can include the words "next to the IMAX theater". . . . A sign you are not necessarily happy to see when you're in the most nowhere part of Nebraska: Now Entering Hooker County. . . .

We leave the country for six damn months and E! has sunk to "Celebrity Profiles: Maury Povich." By Xmas they'll be down to, well, us. Kewl!

Oh how we hate those guys in the Enchirito commercials. Also, the whole idea of saving the chickens in Chicken Run by eating not one but two Whoppers is really fucking twisted, yo. . . . Have we mentioned that they all die at the end of The Perfect Storm—except for that fucking Christopher McDonald, goddammit!

Kelly on "The Real World" is easily—easily!—the hottest roomie in the show's nine year history. She makes Michael woozy. Plus, she actually seems to be an OK chick for a sorority girl. . . . As for Jason, he's got a woman he can't stand to be more than two feet away from, but he loves to fish. . . .

We recently noted that The Family Guy is the Best Show Currently on TV. The other Best Show Currently on TV (sort of) is Action, which is just fucking brilliant. Don't miss it. . . . The politics of, ooh ooh, feelin' good. . . . Buttercup rules, as does Kingsley Amis, Commissioner Foley, and Coldplay. Come to think of it, Bubbles pretty much rules too. . . .

Mash notes, hate mail, simple melodies, and, of course, tasty recipes to:

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