AT PLAY IN THE AISLES OF THE LORD "We have a winner in the produce section!" the raffle announcer proclaimed. Of course, it wasn't much of a produce section yetthere wasn't any produce. Nonetheless, at the glamorous grand opening of Metropolitan Market's Sand Point store, everybody was a winner. Hot Dish was a winner because our press credentials gave us unlimited access to the magnificent spread: Brie en brioche, Snoqualmie Gourmet Ice Cream (pumpkin and peppermint), a luscious olive bar, fresh mozzarella balls that looked to have been handmade by the gods themselves, and tapenades of every conceivable sort. Longtime Metro Market cashier Shannon was a winner because after 14 years at the Queen Anne location, she had scored a transfer to MM's shiny new digs at the Point, with its spiffy break room on the mezzanine level and aisle upon aisle of cinematic grocery-store perfection. Adding to the dreamscape quality of the place was a Fremont Fair-style stilt walker wearing angel wings and dancing to the beat of a jazz combo. The trio produced a rendition of "Girl From Ipanema" as Hot Dish browsed the cold beverage cooler on aisle eight. When we rejoined the party to gaze upon the see-and-be-seen crowdKathy Casey, Nancy Alvord, and scores of tycoons-in-training and superglam soccer momswe heard the jubilant yelp of an official winner: lucky raffle number 856629 was going home with a bag of premium coffee beans that night. LET'S GET IT ON If we're all going to enjoy filets and croquettes for years to come, the salmon have to keep spawning. And while our fishy friends may not be big on romance, they do know how to get down when the time is right. Indulge your inner voyeur outside Olympia, where local "salmon enthusiasts" invite you to watch the salmon spawn in all their lusty glory. If you yearn to see what happens when two salmon love each other very much, report at 9 a.m. on Friday, Nov. 21 (unofficially known as Salmon Day) to the Winged Monument Circle on the State Capitol Campus, wherefrom a bus will whisk you to a salmon restoration site beyond the city limits. After the spawning tour, savor a salmon lunch with "all the fixin's" at the Squaxin Island Museum. In light of the rising Salmon Nation movement (reported on in this space a few weeks back), this entire event suddenly seems less ridiculous than it might have. Call the South Puget Sound Salmon Enhancement Group at 360-412-0808 for more information. GOURMAZON.COM And now, ladies and gentlemen, the proclamation you've all been waiting for: "Amazon.com now offers peeled cherry tomatoes made at a monastery in Rome especially for the Vatican!" We are not making this up. In fact, Jeff Bezos' empire recently made a Faustian pact with food distributors such as Omaha Steaks, Godiva, and the Hancock Gourmet Lobster Company, ensuring that the site you shop for the biblio- and audiophiles in your life can also provide you with "live lobster delivered to your door less than 24 hours from when it was in the ocean." Into exotic meats? Ostrich, rattlesnake, and alligator are as easy to order as the latest John Grisham novel. To explore the future of freaky dot-com conglomeration, visit www.amazon.com/gourmetfood. Just don't come whining to us when your truffle oil stains the pages of Vernon God Little. Food and/or beverage news? E-mail Hot Dish at firstname.lastname@example.org.