Red Robin’s Secret’s in the Sweet

The bird’s buzz will sneak up on you.

The cocktails at Red Robin have much in common with the food. While the grub is the kind of stuff that is easy to scarf down and saturated in fat, the cocktails are as sweet as Jolly Ranchers but deceptively drinkable (translation: Drunkenness sneaks up on you from behind and slaps you on the skull). I'd never been to Red Robin before, but had heard enough local nostalgia-freaks tout its awesomeness that I had to check it out. We assisted our already high blood pressure by eating food wonders like French-Fried Cheese Sticks, Towering Onion Rings, and Just-In-Quesadillas, but it was the cocktails that were the evening's real knock-you-out pleasures. We're talking masterful mixes like Absolut Lemonade (Absolut Citron, amaretto, and Minute Maid Lemonade), Nuclear Ice Tea (gin, rum, triple sec, vodka, sweet 'n' sour, and Coke), and Mango Margaritas (Sauza Gold, Grand Marnier, mango). They were sugary and syrupy and absolutely incredible—the kind of drinks you could feel on your teeth for the rest of the night. And considering the food we had alongside those drinks, we ended up re-tasting them every few minutes as well! 

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